Call me by my name

They say what’s in a name; I say everything is in the name. You may call rose by any other name, for sure it will smell as sweet but ask rose - will it liked to be called by any other name such as Blacky or Creepy . Definitely not.
I have an excellent memory , can remember phone numbers , flight numbers and anything and everything about a person but when it comes to remembering names , I am a complete blank. I remember everything about one acquaintance I bumped into at a coffee shop recently … I remember everything about her… the color of her dress, type of jewellary she was wearing (I am sure all women are good at that!), how many children does she have, which class/ school do they go it, her phone number, where does she live etc etc but don’t ask me her name. Sometimes it is very embarrassing when I fail to remember the name of person with whom I have spoken nth number of times, had lunch also. I have tried all tricks like associating the person’s name with some incident or famous personality but nothing seems to work. Suggestion any one?

Change of Mind

A decade ago there would be a big fight in the house if I even heard about any friend /colleague migrating to the land of opportunities, I would almost die with envy, “They are the lucky ones who will live a life of luxury now and me forced to deal with daily problems of no water supply, frequent power cuts, pollution, corruption, need to pull strings to get anything done even nursery school admissions, and daily kich kich in life over petty issues. “How to get away from all this?” was the constant struggle in my mind
Fast forward to 21st century; things have changed in India and so is my mind.
Day in and day out I am bidding bonvoyage to my colleagues who are sent to company headquarters in Atlanta for a temporary or permanent stay. At times I wonder where has the feeling of envy gone? It has not gone, it has just been replaced by another feeling… a feeling of empathy (if they are going for good)
“I wonder how they will adjust to a different life; won’t it be painful for them to say good bye to the life of comfort – comforts of hot dinner neatly laid on the table when you come home from work, coziness of sleeping late when your driver drives your kids for early morning tennis class, convenience of leaving your kids with a neighbor when you are dancing your heels off on valentine’s day party, availability of all the international brands in the mall next door and that too within reach , flexibility of spending time with your cousins when they are in town on a weekday ( you don’t have to ask them to make their trip only on the weekend and that too inform you two months in advance so that you can book your weekend), your elderly parents having the independence of hiring an auto to roam around when they come for a visit ( need not wait for you to come home and take them out)
Did I mention about ample career opportunities and fat… fatter… fattest pay packages?

Write - Don't write it off

Shivram Gangadhariah has sent a lucid write up on why we should insist on written messages when it comes to official and important communication and just not depend on the vagaries of sound waves.


At a crucial stage in Mahabharata, when asked for confirmation of the news, Dharmaraya announced to Guru Dronacharya "Yes, Ashwatthama, the elephant, is dead". Lord Krishna blew his conch in the middle of the announcement, ensuring that Drona only heard "Ashwatthama is dead". Heartbroken by the news of the death of his beloved son, the hitherto rampant Drona withdrew from the battlefield of Kurukshetra, thus changing its course. Now, if Dronacharya had insisted on a written statement instead of verbal communication, there would have been no scope for manipulation and confusion. Of course, it is not feasible to insist on written communication in mid-battle, but the above story shows the inherent risk in verbal communication.
It is quite possible that you work late hours to meet the client’s deadline and successfully complete module 13, only to find the client unhappily informing you the next day that he actually wanted module 30 done ASAP, not 13. Needless to say, the communication was all verbal, with no documentation whatsoever. It is pointless to argue with the client that “yesterday you had said 13, now you want 30 – how come?”, because client is always right (as is the boss, and the wife!). A short follow-up mail from you to the client immediately after receiving the verbal instruction, stating that “working on module 13, as per your instruction – please confirm” would have done the trick. It would have elicited a response from the client saying “OK, go ahead” or “Correction! I want module 30, not 13”. That would have resulted in a job well-done, and put smiles on all the faces that matter.
In intra-office affairs also, written communication helps avoid unnecessary headache. The strange notion that seems to be floating around of late, that mature people depend on verbal instead of written communication is … well, strange. Written communication does ease your work, but take care not to overdo it, like it is often done in Government offices. One of my previous employers, in the pre-email era, had intra-office memo with the catchy legend printed at top: “Don’t say - Write”. It did help reduce confusion, and the resulting friction.